Dating Beijing Girls – The Misunderstood Chinese Girl

Dating Beijing Girls - A constant concern of Westerners (especially Western women) is that Chinese women are really interested in Western men for only one reason, to get a passport from a Western country.

Don't kid yourself, the Western gal will warn you, a Chinese woman will just marry you, move back to your home country, get her passport, then dump you and live the good life.

Why else, she will say, would a cute Chinese girl be interested in someone like you?

Never mind that the latter question clarifies quite clearly why Western men are getting more than a little put off by Western women (they think they're too good for us), it also represents a false generalization of what is really the draw to us for Chinese women, suspiciously a falsehood that conveniently supports the Western woman's quest to eliminate a source of competition that just maybe has her out-classed.

Dating Beijing Girls – The Reality

The reality is that Chinese women are for the most part poorer than Western men and do not enjoy nearly the freedoms enjoyed by citizens of many Western countries (although both these situations are changing rapidly), so of course they are interested in a man who can provide a better lifestyle.

But why shouldn't they be?

Most of us have a list of many qualities that we are seeking in a life-mate, and so do most Chinese women.

If your passport (or wealth) is the only item on the Chinese woman's list of desirable qualities, then indeed that is a dangerous thing, and one to be avoided.

Dating Beijing Girls – The East-West Divide

However, the same must be said of Western women.

How often is the primary question asked of you during that first meeting "What do you do?", and how long does that first meeting last after you answer "I drive a bus. (or teach, or work in a factory, etc.)?".

I daresay the percentage of Western women who are "not interested" in a man unless he is wealthy is higher than the percentage of Chinese women, or at least, what is "wealthy" to a Chinese woman is achievable by most of us, while what is "wealthy" to a Western woman generally rules out everyone who drives less than a "Benz".

To an average Chinese woman a Honda Civic is a luxury vehicle.

Dating Beijing Girls – Qualities to Apply

Some other qualities that a Chinese woman will have on her list of desirables that a Western woman takes as her given right are:

1. We treat her with respect.

2. We care about her feelings.

3. We are polite to her.

4. We don't make her carry heavy objects while we are empty handed.

5. We don't expect her to walk 8 feet behind us.

6. We are not ashamed to hold hands with her.

7. We like to have fun and welcome her to have fun too.

8. We actually want to take care of her.

9. We actually want her to want us to take care of her.

10. We will not have 3 girlfriends on the side.

11. We actually care if she has a climax or not.

There are hundreds more that are all possible qualities she is looking for.

If that Western woman didn't already have the same passport as you, do you think it wouldn't be on her list? I'm sure your own list is not without self interested items.

In fact, isn't physical beauty the #1 item on your list, you cad!

It's the whole list combined that matters, and the list of most Chinese women is much easier for a Western man to fulfill than is the list of most Western women (unless you happen to be Brad Pitt), while at the same time most Chinese women are far more desirable as life-mates than many Western women (unless you are particularly attracted by the growing trend towards obesity, selfishness and arrogance).

Dating Beijing Girls – Cross-Cultural Misunderstandings

Of course you should enter your relationship with a Chinese woman with some caution, and feel your way through it with a little bit of guardedness, but no more so than with any other woman from any other culture.

There is a whole lot of other cross cultural misunderstandings that are more likely to blindside you than the simple and natural fact that your lifestyle appeals to your Chinese mate.

Watch this MTV of China Girl

Harry Monohan (nom de plume), much experienced with life in China, has had several long term relationships with both Western and Chinese women. He currently lives and works in China and is happily committed to a three year relationship with a beautiful Chinese lady.For more good stuff on Chinese Women, International Relationships and Things Chinese go to http://www.ChinaLoveMatch.net and click on CLM eMagazine